A Psychologist Lists 2 Ways To Become A Better Parent To An LGBT Child

Pride Month may be coming to an end, but advocacy for your queer child shouldn’t. Here’s how toIt’s Pride Month—a time for allies and LGBTQ+ individuals to celebrate queer folk, their community and the strides that have been taken towards creating a better world for this minority group. However, it’s vital that our allyship for the LGBTQ+ community not end when June ends.in terms of bullying, harassment, discrimination and even violence.

The authors highlight that when parents are unsupportive, it forces queer children to compartmentalize their lives, separating their family interactions from their true identities. One participant in the study, a lesbian child, shared a poignant example: “We were driving by a church with a sign that said something about man and woman find each other in a certain way and then get married. And mom looked back at me and said, ‘Yeah,and woman.

She further explained that, since coming out, “I don’t talk with my mom. I had the best relationship with my mom, and since I’m different in her eyes, she thinks that that relationship isn’t there anymore.” Conditional support for an LGBTQ+ child creates a feedback loop of loneliness and alienation. Even with supportive peers, the lack of acceptance at home—the place where they should feel most safe—results in a persistent source of shame, guilt, and isolation.

Conversely, positive and supportive parental responses can create a transformative feedback loop for queer children. For instance, another participant in the study shared, “My mom tries to educate herself so she can be supportive for me, and if I have problems, I can go to her.” This kind of response is what makes a child feel most secure.

When a child knows that their parents unconditionally love and support them, and are willing to learn what it takes to be an ally, they feel safe and comfortable turning to them. They understand that—regardless of what challenges they face—they can always return to a supportive and loving home. This environment, where there’s always a shoulder to cry on and someone who celebrates their identity, is crucial for their happiness and safety.

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