Brené Brown's No. 1 tip for learning from your mistakes

You miss a deadline, forget an important birthday, say the wrong thing in a meeting: all these can induce a cycle of severe self-criticism, also known as negative self-talk.

You might think being hard on yourself after a professional or personal faux pas will help you to not make that same mistake in the future. Oftentimes this isn't the case, though, says Judy Ho, a neuropsychologist and professor at Pepperdine University. "We beat ourselves up in our head thinking, 'Oh, this is going to motivate me,' but, actually, we just end up fulfilling a self-fulfilling prophecy," Ho says.."People who are mentally tough stay mentally tough because they don't slip easily into shame or self-criticism or self-loathing.

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