Jerry Falwell Jr. Tells Story Of Jesus Getting Revenge On Apostle Who Ratted Out His Corruption Schemes

Hesiod2k11 Shorter Gospel: snitches get stitches. So sayeth the Lord.

Okay, I was given Jr. the benefit of the doubt. He is not speaking the truth. Oh no! He isn't teaching the students the truth. Students, The Almighty and His Son Jesus is pure Love. Revenge is not of Jesus or His Father. Jr. Is lying to you. .

“...true believers knew that the Lord works in mysterious ways and that it was incumbent upon them to give Him the benefit of the doubt and trust that He had everyone’s spiritual and financial interests in mind.” GOLD! 🥇

I’m glad you are not making an issue of his secret homosexuality.

I thought this was supposed to be satire

AmyAyers16 Glad it's actually the Onion this time, I always have to look twice

So long as you confess after, you get to go to heaven.

Green_Footballs Poe's Law in action: Fundy fake historian David Barton actually does claim that Jesus was against the minimum wage and the capital gains tax.

What about the pool boy? I want to hear more about him...

This was detailed in depth within the Gospels of Giovanni. Giovanni 16:4 is quite disturbing even for today.

Has he been watching the Righteous Gemstones?

I think this was in the Gospel of Timothy? 🤔

The whole school is corrupt. Just look who owns the towing company there. It's a former provost. Students are amazing there and teachers for the most part are great people. Admin is dirty as painted black dirt.- former liberty student

I wish you were so funny and clever that Snopes needed to fact check you.

Jesus was a Jewish Greco Palestinian Cynic. See Crossan and Kloppenberg.

Says, the Lerd loved them whores as well!

FALWELL :SO YOU SEE, EVEN GOD HIMSELF ENDORSES ME EVERYONE: LET ME SEE THAT. FALWELL l: NO.

2 Trump 15:1-2 Whatsoever shall it profitteth a man that he sell his soul to the Devil for Power that he not indeed be the Chose One. He will lose everything. Verily, that is a deal poorly made.

Never rat on your friends. And keep your mouth shut.

That's not a joke. That's how likes of him roll when their hypocrisy comes to light.

Jesus was a vengeful sob.

This a goofy goober moment

JerryFalwellJr “And Jesus said unto the Apostles ‘snitches getteth stitches’”

Popehat JerryFalwellJr His chest tattoo reads: Hostile Apostles Become Fossils

Popehat JerryFalwellJr Completely believable. Is this even an Onion Article?

JerryFalwellJr This cannot be found in the Bible, and therefore is a prime example of fake news by the libs!

JerryFalwellJr The J man was selling the water he turned into wine without a liquor license!! Philip ratted him out to the Romans.

JerryFalwellJr Satire but not funny. What else is new

JerryFalwellJr Snitches getteth stitches. 👼

JerryFalwellJr look no one's perfect. you know who taught you that one. yes, big J. little corruption on the side? a man like him? its nothing. cmon.

JerryFalwellJr 👇The Onion Falwell ended his sermon by reminding his audience about the importance of keeping God’s 11th commandment, “Thou shalt not squeal.”

JerryFalwellJr it's in Matthew 35:12-19

JerryFalwellJr And lo! Jesus said unto the apostles gathered there, “Dead finks don’t talk.”

JerryFalwellJr Awesome. Now do one like this on Islam, and tell me what happens. Lol

Zigmanfreud JerryFalwellJr That’s rich

JerryFalwellJr He looks just like the actor Danny McBride, who plays him on the show.

JerryFalwellJr

jonrog1 JerryFalwellJr Don't remember learning that in CCD! Didn't know Jesus was corrupt!!! Hmmmmmm.........

JerryFalwellJr And yay he said unto them, 'Snitches get Stiches'

JerryFalwellJr Well..keep reading JerryFalwellJr get to Matthew 7:15 , 24: 24 for God's sake read the whole thing because he is clear about false prophets...

JerryFalwellJr BearFilth perfect.

JerryFalwellJr He needs to go and reread the chapter & verses again. Maybe he has a different bible than the rest of us

allahpundit JerryFalwellJr Why would he tell a story like that about Jesus? Jesus isn’t alive to defend himself against such lies.

JerryFalwellJr Jesus was very Cross . . . . . . . . . HAHAHHHah ahha hah a ha haha ha ha ha ha ha ha h aha h ah aha ha

JerryFalwellJr Trump, the 13th apostle. He was the one hiding under the rock..

JerryFalwellJr And Jesus turned to Peter and said “Peter you signed an NDA so keep the talk about my giant dong and my wife’s pictures with the personal trainer to yourself. Also you don’t know a GD thing about the properties”

JerryFalwellJr Next it will be legal to sleep with you're sister or first cousin in those southern holes who follow Jerry jr.

JerryFalwellJr It's not funny when it's not satire, guys

JerryFalwellJr

JerryFalwellJr megkirby97

JerryFalwellJr I remember this story. It’s the one where Jesus finally got so mad that he said “shit”.

JerryFalwellJr His name was Phil

JerryFalwellJr “If Jesus had been married he definitely would have shared Mrs. Christ’s nudes with the 12. He told me. MAGA”

JerryFalwellJr Evangelicals would believe this.

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‘Someone’s Gotta Tell the Freakin’ Truth’: Jerry Falwell’s Aides Break Their SilenceMore than two dozen current and former Liberty University officials describe a culture of fear and self-dealing at the largest Christian college in the world. Trump campaign paid $12,000 cash to Liberty employee to fake polling numbers? ChuckRossDC Successful private university educating students in a Christian environment to which Politico has zero standing into how its run. Religion is a hustle, a con, a scam.
Source: politico - 🏆 381. / 59 Read more »

Liberty University Board Concerned Falwell’s Corruption Risks Undercutting College’s Mission Of Subjugating Women And Gay PeopleLYNCHBURG, VA—Expressing fears that the recent scandal could harm the institution’s reputation, members of the Liberty University board told reporters Monday they were concerned investigations into Jerry Falwell Jr.’s corruption risked undermining the college’s core mission of subjugating women and gay people. “When students pay tuition to Liberty University, we want them to be confident that their money is going towards fighting female bodily autonomy and torturing gay children, but these rampant ethical concerns make it hard for them to trust us,” said trustee Vance Weir, acknowledging that stories about the university’s president using college funds to enrich his inner circle could distract from the school’s long-held commitment to propagating the belief that homosexuals should not exist and females are merely sexual objects. “I’m deeply worried about how far we’ve strayed from the school’s original purpose. Jerry Falwell Sr. founded this university in 1971 to help straight, white Christian men continue their dominion over other groups by any means necessary, not to line his own pockets.” Weir added that despite Falwell Jr.’s inappropriate actions, he knew that in his heart, the university’s president was deeply committed to the important work of dehumanizing others. JerryFalwellJr Hopefully they can find enough money to do both,, liberty has proved themself’s as a model institution after hiring hugh freeze and Baylor’s Atheltic Director and endorsing trump ,, 👮🏻👮🏻🇺🇸🇺🇸 one college I would consider sending my great grandson to (if not a water head) JerryFalwellJr I first read this as '.....Falwell's gay.....' I don't know why my brain connected those dots in the first split second I glanced at it. Maybe all the pool boy stuff; I don't know... my silly brain... JerryFalwellJr I thought i told you to stop reporting real news
Source: TheOnion - 🏆 724. / 51 Read more »