To discover what others think and feel, we have to learn how to ask the right questions, in the right ways.
On the other hand, when we do tap into this goldmine of hidden insights, we can create deeper, more meaningful relationships and unlock new levels of learning and growth. This post outlines a five-step approach for discovering what those around you really think and feel.Each of us is constantly telling ourselves stories about our own lives and the people in them. We get wrapped up in judgment and resentment andChoosing curiosity is all about breaking out of these certainty loops.
By contrast, quality questions help you learn something from the other person. They signal true curiosity, reflecting a genuine intent to learn from and understand the other person—not to prove a point or influence or fix them. They invite honesty by being clear and direct, with no alternate agenda. Quality questions tap into the other person’s story to surface the underlying meanings, reasons, emotions, and experiences.shows that we hear only a sliver of what people are really telling us.
Lastly, you have to process what you heard in a way that really allows you to learn and grow from it. To do this, ask yourself these three questions: How might what I heard revise my story about the situation? Based on what I heard, what action steps can I take? How might what I heard challenge my deeper worldviews, assumptions, or ways of being?