3 Tips To Solve The Paradox Of Marital Boredom, From A Psychologist

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Mark Travers, Ph.D., is an American psychologist with degrees from Cornell University and the University of Colorado Boulder. He is the lead psychologist at Awake Therapy, a telehealth company that provides video and telephone psychotherapy, counseling, and coaching to individuals in over 40 countries worldwide.

Many couples come to therapy worried about having gotten “too close for comfort.” They might express their concern saying things like:

These statements are reminiscent of the “intimacy paradox,” whereby increased closeness in a relationship coexists with a lack of intimacy. As couples become more emotionally connected, they often settle into repetitive routines, inadvertently creating boredom or reduced intimacy.found that it can lead to an increase in frustration, negative exchanges, diminished mood and impaired judgment.

Growth expectations can evolve over time and developing a habit to check in with your partner about their goals, interests and dreams can keep the relationship exciting.The intimacy paradox persists when partners try to sweep it under the rug instead of addressing what might be causing the slump proactively through communication.

 

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