Last Halloween, I had some children come to the door who informed me quite rudely that they didn’t want what was offered. I told them they didn’t have to take it, and they asked if I had anything else. No please or thank you, of course, and their adults were standing right there.
Auntie is just like this! She comes and goes! We enjoy her when she dips in, but we never know when she’s going to dip out. The only “danger” in this is that your daughter is likely to grow up idealizing her mysterious, only occasionally present aunt. This will drive your husband batty. But I think he needs to work out his problems with his sister with her and leave Auntie’s niece out of it. Even if the child is loved and paid attention to by her aunt only sporadically, it’s still love. And there’s no such thing as a child being loved by too many people, and no need to cut out those who love her imperfectly.
If I try to talk him out of going to our son, he says our son is being “traumatized” by being left in his crib.
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