, “himpathy” is also a reaction to girls failing to just be girls: “There’s this puritanical aspect of it that tells us ‘good girls forgive’—that if you are filing complaints against him, you’re not a good girl, you’re not fitting within your gender norm,” she said. “Because you should be forgiving. You should be kind. And if not, you should be punished.” She’s come to see “himpathy” ultimately as a tool of gender role enforcement on college campuses.
Carson spoke to one survivor through Know Your IX who recalled asking her university for a no-contact order against her assailant to prohibit him from being in her classes or organizations. But when her assailant complained about the no-contact order, it was withdrawn, and he promptly began showing up at her dorm and club meetings.
College sexual assault, in the eyes of administrators, is so common they no longer see it as alarming. In the Title IX office Bedera observed, there was no feminized version of “himpathy.” Women are rarely on the receiving end of Title IX reports—Bedera’s research includes three incidents of Title IX cases brought against women—but when they are , Bedera told Jezebel no consideration is given to how consequences will “ruin their lives.
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