“But I Went to Law School! I Couldn’t Possibly Have… Oh.”

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'As the kids say, I was 'shook.' But in a strange way, receiving my ADHD diagnosis also felt like arriving at a familiar place of comfort. Home, even. All of a sudden, so much more about me made sense.'

Some days, I move through the world seeing only half of it. I don’t mean that figuratively — my distractibility is so high I sometimes forget to put in both contact lenses and leave one behind. I usually don’t notice that the vision in one eye is clear and the other slightly blurry until after I’ve left the house.

At 38 years old, I made an offhand remark about this lack of focus to my doctor during a routine appointment. “” he asked. When I confirmed that I had, to the point of madness, he suggested I be evaluated for The more I studied up on ADHD, the more I understood myself. Take trip-planning. Until my diagnosis, I did not understand why I could not plan a trip to save my life.

Limited executive function, that’s why. An under-stimulated frontal lobe. Those mental refrains are more constructive than “failure,” and much less likely to suck you down into the dark, hostile plumbing of the shame drain.My ADHD is currently well-managed: I exercise, prioritize protein intake, use fish oil supplements, and take daily medication. With a few walks around the block sprinkled in, I’m able to focus at work for the whole day.

 

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